Toasted ham and cheese…

that is what I am craving as I type…I just can’t get it out of my head.

I’m now used to drinking my coffee black, it’s really not that bad.  I’ve given up anything that remotely looks like pasta.  I don’t drink any milk and I wouldn’t dare have a grain of rice.  Even chocolate has willingly gone by the way side.  But I would give my left arm for a ham and cheese toastie right now.  I’ve just clocked two weeks of this new gig..dang it, it honestly feels like at least a month.  If I wasn’t actually feeling better I’d be chucking it all in and resigning myself to a life of plus size and pizza.

Angela’s last words of  ‘unfortunately you won’t see anything happen on the scales for about six months’ are starting to haunt me. Did I make the right decision going down this crazy version of what I can only describe as Paleo? Is this life of deprivation really going to make me better (I’m now missing French cheese and baguettes…).  Maybe it is just the deprivation that will eventually see the weight go?  And there we are, going around and around in vicious bloody circles.  In the meantime, I’ll stick with my beans and tuna reminding myself I’m doing good things for my insides, even if I can’t see them.

I had every intention of writing a somewhat chirpier post.  Thanks for sticking in there until the end of a not so fabulous brain dump.  I think the rain has got me down or something (I can’t imagine why, its really the first rain we’ve had since we got home from Europe).  Next post, I promise you something more…you never know, I might share some awesome dairy free, grain free, gluten free recipe I find…

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